Found via my subscription to This is True. I can't even believe this really happened.

Single mom in Ontario, Canada, drops off her 11-year-old autistic daughter at school. School calls her and asks her to come back right away. Frightened, she returns.

She is informed that they believe her daughter has been sexually abused. What's the evidence?

"The teacher looked and me and said: 'We have to tell you something. The educational assistant who works with Victoria went to see a psychic last night, and the psychic asked the educational assistant at that particular time if she works with a little girl by the name of "V." And she said 'yes, I do.' And she said, 'well, you need to know that that child is being sexually abused by a man between the ages of 23 and 26.'"

People, I shit you not.

..."But things got worse when school officials used the "evidence" and accepted the completely unsubstantiated word of the seer by reporting the case to Children's Aid, which promptly opened a file on the family.

"They reported me to Children's Aid," Leduc declares, still disbelieving. "Based on a psychic!"...

...under the Child and Family Services Act, anyone who works with children and has reasonable grounds to suspect a youngster is being harmed, must report it immediately - and the CAS has an obligation to follow up.

And so a case worker came to the Leduc home to discuss the allegations of sexual misconduct, only to admit there wasn't a shred of evidence that anything had ever happened at all. They labelled Leduc a "diligent" mother doing the best she could for her child under difficult circumstances, closed the file and left, calling the report "ridiculous."

"It is highly unusual, I will admit, to have a case called in based upon what a psychic might say," concedes Sue Dale of the Simcoe County CAS.

Look, I'm certainly not in favor of child abusers going free. And if you suspect someone is hurting a child, you should say something.

But to actually sic Child Services on a woman because of a psychic?

This teacher's assistant should not be anywhere near children. Ever again.

So did you hear about Netflix doing away with Profiles in accounts?

Yeah. So now instead of me having my own personal ratings for movies I like, and Hubby having ratings for movies he likes -- and trust me, there is not a whole lot of overlap -- we would have to mush our lists together.

And they're doing it to "improve service". Yeah. Sure.

Right now we have the 3-at-a-time service, which costs $16.99.

If we want to keep our queues separate, we'd have to cancel and open two new accounts. So if I had a 1-at-a-time, and he had 2-at-a-time, that would be $8.99 + $13.99 a month. Or $22.98, $6 more a month than we pay now.

If we each got our own 1-at-a-time account, it would be $8.99 * 2, or $17.98. Just about a dollar more than we're paying now, but for one less DVD a month.

I wrote and told them that, if they went through with this, we would cancel our account. If you're annoyed about it too, use the "Contact Us" link on their website, and tell them via "Suggestions."

I realize things are tough all over, but this is just blatant money-grubbing.

From UPI. Spot the dumbassery:

Tennessee Dem apologizes for Obama remarks

NASHVILLE, June 18 (UPI) -- A prominent Tennessee Democratic leader has apologized for comments connecting Barack Obama to terrorists.

Fred Hobbs has apologized for recent comments in which he said Obama, the presumptive Democratic presidential nominee, "may be terrorist-connected," The Nashville Tennessean reported Wednesday.

Hobbs, a member of the Tennessee Democratic Party's executive committee, said in a brief statement posted on the party Web site that he wasn't "as well prepared as I should have been when speaking with reporters" and that his remarks were based on "what I had seen reported on Fox News. . . I should have taken some time to check the accuracy of what I saw on television before speaking publicly."

Hey Fred! Fight the Smears.com!

Of course his first mistake was listening to Fake News.

Now here's a dopey headline from UPI:

Many with breast cancer don't sleep well

This is news? I could imagine that having breast cancer might give me a few sleepless nights!

Last evening we were watching Wednesday's Daily Show (for we are old, have jobs, and cannot stay up till midnight). The always-excellent Aasif Mandvi was speaking to Hillary supporters, including yet another young man who said he would vote for McCain instead.

A young gay man.

(He self-identified, but truly it wasn't a shocker.)

OH COME ON.

You're going to vote for a party that trundles gay people out to the "values voters" in the South as the boogeyman? While at the same time gay people work for Republican congressmen, or even as head of the RNC (hello Kenny Mehlman)?

And you see no problem with that?

Just... just... AAGH.

Bwa ha ha ha ha. Thanks of course to Our Mr. Olbermann for pointing out this story:

Judge tosses school official's lawsuit against Fox News

A federal judge has thrown out a school superintendent's lawsuit against Fox News, saying the cable news channel acted unprofessionally but without malice when anchors on "Fox and Friends" reported a parody story about ham as fact last year.

The case was an outgrowth of an April 2007 prank in which a middle school student tossed a slab of leftover Easter ham onto a table surrounded by Somali Muslim youngsters, knowing the Muslims would be offended. Muslims consider pork unclean.

A few days later, a parody story spoofing the ham controversy was posted online. The story attributed numerous made-up quotes to Superintendent Leon Levesque, including the need to teach kids that "ham is not a toy" and references to developing an "anti-ham response plan." The joke story, written by freelancer Nicholas Plagman, falsely listed the Associated Press as the source of the information.

The spoof was reported as fact on "Fox and Friends" on April 23. After Levesque contacted Fox, the network aired a retraction.

Among other things, the anchors had quoted Levesque as saying, "All our students should feel welcome in our schools, knowing that they are safe from attacks with ham, bacon, pork chops or any other delicious meat that comes from pigs."

The anchors also told viewers several times, "We are not making this up."

In his slander suit, Levesque who sought $75,000 in damages, said he was ridiculed and overwhelmed for days with phone calls and hate mail, including threatening calls to his home.

U.S. District Judge D. Brock Hornby, who sits in Portland, concluded Tuesday that Fox News was unprofessional in reporting false and "outrageous quotations" without confirming their accuracy, but did not act out of malice.

Named as defendants in the suit were Fox News Network, and "Fox and Friends" co-hosts Steve Doocy and Brian Kilmeade.

The Fox co-hosts "were certainly gullible," Hornby wrote, adding that portions of the fake story were "so absurd that they should have raised the defendants' truth-seeking antennae and caused them to question the accuracy of the article."

But failure to investigate before publishing, "even when a reasonably prudent person would have done so, is not sufficient to establish reckless disregard," the judge concluded. "The First Amendment protects journalists even when they are gullible."

They report, you're misinformed!

Which brain trust thought this up? From UPI:

Report: PTSD barracks near firing range

FORT BENNING, Ga.,  June 3 (UPI) -- A newly built Army barracks designed to help soldiers with post-traumatic stress disorder is located near a firing range, the Washington Post reported Tuesday.

The location of the barracks on the grounds of Fort Benning (Ga.) is producing additional stress and anxiety attacks among patients who are within earshot of constant barrages of rifle and machine gun fire from training exercises, the newspaper said.

The barracks for the Warrior Transition Battalion, part of the Martin Army Community Hospital at Fort Benning, were established as part of an effort to ease the growing number of soldiers with PTSD back into normal life. But in interviews with the Post, barracks residents said the proximity to the firing range is counterproductive.

"You hear a lot of shots, it puts you in a defensive mode," Sgt. Jonathan Strickland, a diagnosed PTSD sufferer, told the newspaper. "My heart starts racing and I get all excited and irritable."

Army officials said they were unaware of problems with the barracks' location.

"No soldier has talked with me about the ranges," Lt. Col. Sean Mulcahey, commander of the Warrior Transition Battalion, told the Post. "If it is an issue, "we will address it."

Yeah, address it like you did the issues with Walter Reed? So we can expect action sometime in 2015 then.

Seriously? Really?

Dunkin' Donuts pulled a television spot featuring talk show host and Food Network personality Rachael Ray this weekend after a Fox news commentator associated it with terrorists.

In the ad, Ray is wearing a scarf that Michelle Malkin said in her nationally syndicated column resembled a kiffiyeh, Middle Eastern garb that is "popularized by Yasser Arafat and a regular adornment of Muslim terrorists appearing in beheading and hostage-taking videos."

Dunkin's Senior Vice President for Communications Margie Myers issued a statement saying the scarf "was selected by a stylist for the advertising shoot. Absolutely no symbolism was intended.

"However, as of this past weekend, we are no longer using the online ad because the possibility of misperception detracted from its original intention to promote our iced coffee."

In her column, Malkin also noted that it could appear at times that actor Colin Farrell, rapper Kanye West and Democratic National Committee Chairman Howard Dean have been photographed in similar scarves that were "distinctive hate couture."

Apparently Keith Olbermann recommends a Dunkin Donuts boycott for folding in the face of this truly ludicrous nuttery. I say, hey, why not cut back on trans fats and make a point at the same time?

At first, this blurb on BloggingStocks seems stupid:

Starbucks scandal strikes Olsen sisters

Posted May 21st 2008 11:40AM by Peter Cohan
Filed under: Starbucks (SBUX)

MSNBC reports on an earth-shattering scandal sure to make heads roll at Starbucks (NYSE: SBUX). Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen have been ordering Grande nonfat lattes from their favorite New York City West Village Starbucks. However, a barista there has reportedly been serving the lattes with whole milk.

According to a source quoted by MSNBC, "the barista thought the Olsens were too thin, so whenever they ordered their usual drink, he would replace the skim milk with full-fat." The Olsen's representative commented: "This is ridiculous."

At first, second, and third actually.

But then I thought about this: "the barista thought the Olsens were too thin, so whenever they ordered their usual drink, he would replace the skim milk with full-fat."

So this guy took it upon himself to change their order based on what he thought was right for them?

What if they had high cholesterol, and had to have skim milk so as to avoid saturated fats?

Was he also swapping out regular milk for skim for people he thought were too fat?

How about not giving sugary drinks to overweight people so they don't develop diabetes?

Or switching regular brew for decaf if he thought someone looked like they had hypertension? Since he was clearly a medical expert.

Thanks, barista guy, for knowing better than I do what's best for me. Geez, next some pharmacist will tell me I can't have a birth control prescription... Oh wait.

From UPI:

SoCal man admits fake Medal of Honor claim

LOS ANGELES, May 6 (UPI) -- A member of a Los Angeles-area water board pleaded guilty Monday to charges he lied about winning the Medal of Honor.

Xavier Alvarez, 50, was the first person in the United States to be charged under the Stolen Valor Act, which made it a crime to falsely claim to have been awarded military decorations.

"We have to guard the honor of our nation's military heroes, and this prosecution was a small attempt to do that," said Assistant U.S. Atty. Craig Missakian.

Alvarez, a Pomona resident, had parlayed tales of his supposed heroism as a U.S. Marine when he ran for his seat on the Three Valleys Municipal Water District. The Los Angeles Times said Alvarez once claimed he had dangled by rope from a helicopter to pluck the American flag from the besieged U.S. Embassy in Tehran.

Alvarez made his claim about winning the Medal of Honor after he was elected.

Sentencing was scheduled for July 21. The Times said he would likely get probation.

At first, I thought having an actual charge for lying about being decorated was a bit much. But when an elected official lies about dangling off a helicopter to grab an American flag? Yeah, charge him with something.

And PS, Mr. Missakian, if you're worried about "guarding the honor of our nation's military heroes," what are you doing to help the thousands of homeless veterans sleeping on the streets? What did you do about the conditions at Walter Reed, where our injured soldiers were living in squalor?

Just sayin', sir.

Have you read Dear Abby yet today? OMG. It's pathetic! Here she is trying to do something nice for her parents' anniversary, and she cannot win! LORD.

From UPI:

Woman accused of beating at Disney World

ORLANDO, Fla., April 7 (UPI) -- An Alabama woman could receive 15 years in jail for allegedly beating a woman while in line at Disney World's "Mad Tea Party" ride, a newspaper said.

Victoria Walker, 52, is accused of choking and beating Clermont, Fla. resident, Aimee Krause, while in the "tea cup" line at the Orlando, Fla., theme park, WKMG-TV, Orlando, Fla. reported Monday.

Walker lost her temper because she thought Krause and her kids were allowed to cut ahead of her in line, a witness said.

Walker reportedly was interviewed by authorities after the alleged beating, but permitted to travel back to her home in Alabama. The judge didn't issue an arrest warrant for Walker until he realized the seriousness of Krause's injuries, WKMG reported.

It is reported that Walker has refused a one-year jail sentence plea deal and could be given 15 years behind bars if convicted.

What a wonderful example for the children.

From Dana Milbank in the WaPo:

Meet Alan Schwartz, welfare recipient.

As the chief executive of Bear Stearns, he's getting rather more public assistance than your typical welfare mom -- specifically, $30 billion in federal loan guarantees to help J.P. Morgan Chase take over his firm. But then, Schwartz has had rather more than his share of suffering of late.

As his firm collapsed, he was forced to forgo his entire 2007 bonus, leaving his compensation for the past five years at a paltry $141 million, according to Business Week. Things have become so bad that, the Wall Street Journal discovered, Schwartz has had to rent out his 7,850-square-foot home on the ninth green of a suburban New York golf course -- leaving the poor fellow with only his 17-room, seven-acre home in Greenwich, his condo in Colorado and the athletic center he built for Duke University....

Gasp! How can he LIVE???

From TPMCafe.com. Emphasis is mine:

The news that J.P. Morgan bought investment house giant Bear Stearns for just $236 million, or $2 a share, sent tremors through financial markets around the world today. This is company whose stock was worth almost one hundred times as much a year ago. Its building alone is valued at close to $1 billion, which suggests that all the other assets of this 85 year-old investment bank had a negative value – Bear Stearns liabilities exceed its assets.

Further confirming this view is the fact that the Fed apparently had to make guarantees to J.P. Morgan of $30 billion in order to get the bank to take Bear Stearns even at this price. That suggests the bank had a lot of real garbage on its books. The markets are right to be worried. Of course with the $8 trillion housing bubble in full meltdown, there will undoubtedly be much more bad news for the banks in the months ahead.

One person who does not have to worry is James Cayne, the recently departed chief executive of Bear Stearns. According to the New York Times, he walked with $232 million in compensation over the period from 1993 to 2006. This is just another example of how the global economy rewards extraordinary talent.

The official line is that the Fed had to get involved and make the guarantees in order to keep the markets in order. This is not clear. It is not easy to accept Fed pronouncements these days. After all, just last year Chairman Bernanke was telling us that the problems in the subprime market were likely to be contained. It is time that the Fed comes clean with both an honest assessment of the severity of the problem and increased transparency in its behind the scenes deals with the big banks.

There is something a bit obscene about billions of taxpayer dollars going to the country's richest people, when average workers can't afford health care for their kids.

Here's my nominee for today's Worst Person in the World. From the Philadelphia Inquirer:

WASHINGTON, Pa. - A Washington County hairstylist shot a client who was complaining about her haircut, police said.

Monique Reed, 38, of Washington, was arrested Thursday and charged with shooting Lauren Newton in the small of her back.

Newton, 28, was getting a haircut at Reed's house when they argued about the style, Police Chief James Blyth said.

Reed "went to the bedroom, got a gun, fired a shot in the ceiling," Blyth said. Reed then shot Newton, who was trying to flee with her sister, Blyth said.

Newton was being treated in a Pittsburgh hospital, and her injuries were not considered life-threatening, police said.

Reed was charged with aggravated assault and reckless endangerment. She was arraigned late Thursday and sent to the county jail.

The district judge's office said Reed had not listed an attorney as of late Thursday. She remained in jail Friday, prison officials said.

The NRA, shockingly, made no comment.

PS: my runner-up for WPitW is the person who headlined this item as follows:

Temper is likely hair trigger

Articles with quotes like these get me so damn mad:

...An informal survey of employees at a local bank, gym, library, and neighborhood restaurant turned up no Obama supporters. Some residents said they were concerned that he might not take into account the concerns of whites.

"If Obama gets in, it's going to be a black thing and it's going to be all blacks for blacks," said Victoria Mikulski, a 63-year-old clerk in Edison Park. "Everything's got to be equal."

And junk like this:

Teri Harris, a laid-off school bus driver and single mother from the Cleveland suburb of Madison, said during canvassing on behalf of Clinton that she was bothered that Obama "turns his back during the Pledge of Allegiance," repeating a false rumor propagated on the Internet. "Does he believe in our country? I'm a little leery of that," said Harris, 48. Youngstown State University student Patrick Smith, 22, cited the same false rumor in rejecting Obama. "How can you be president if you don't say the Pledge of Allegiance?" he asked.

I mean, what the hell can you do about people like this?

"Race played a significant factor in Ohio," said Cuyahoga County Commissioner Timothy Hagan, who supported Obama. "These people are not necessarily bigots, but the image they see every day of black America is drugs, crime, guns and violence."

You know what? If you can't tell the difference between a Harvard-educated lawyer and the damn kids who tagged your car last month, you deserve the president you get.

And as I've said before, I realize people are busy (WORKING THE TWO AND THREE PART-TIME JOBS THEY NEED TO JUST KEEP THEIR HEADS ABOVE WATER BECAUSE BUSH'S ECONOMY SUCKS). But if you're deciding who you want for President based on some e-mail forward you got from your Aunt Ginny -- alongside her recipe for peanut brittle -- you deserve the president you get!

And if you are laid off but you're more concerned about whether a guy wears a stupid lapel pin as the measure of a man, you deserve the president you get!

You know what? It's economic and political Darwinism. If you stay ignorant, the Republicans' pet policies will wipe you and your family out.

To a certain extent, this subprime mortgage crisis is economic Darwinism. I'm not talking about people who didn't understand the fixed to ARM mortgage they signed... although I don't think you have to be an MBA to realize that if you don't understand it, don't sign it. I digress...

But by all means, keep judging a person based on whether or not he wears a lapel pin, like Larry Craig and Tom Delay wore in their mugshots. You just go on listening to your cousin Bucky, who after a week of watching Fox and Friends thinks he's a political scientist. Don't actually go on the candidates' websites, or read their voting records in the Senate to get a sense of what they really care about.

Meanwhile, I'll be over here, sipping my latte, and enjoying President McCain's tax cuts, while your kids are shipped off to Iraq for the next 100 years' war.

From Talking Points Memo:

For Barack Obama, it is an ember that he has doused time and again, only to see it flicker anew: links to Islam fanned by false rumors, innuendo and association.

Obama and his campaign reacted strongly this week when a photo of him in Kenyan tribal garb began spreading on the Internet. And the praise he received Sunday from Nation of Islam Minister Louis Farrakhan prompted pointed questions — during Tuesday night's presidential debate and also in a private meeting over the weekend with Jewish leaders in Cleveland.

During the debate, Obama repeated his denunciation of Farrakhan's views, which have included numerous anti-Semitic comments. And, after being pressed, he rejected Farrakhan's support in the presidential race.

The Democratic candidate says repeatedly that he's a Christian who took the oath of office on a family Bible. Yet on the Internet and on talk radio — and in a campaign introduction for John McCain this week — he is often depicted, falsely, as a Muslim with shadowy ties and his middle name, Hussein, is emphasized as a reminder of Iraq's former leader.

"If anyone is still puzzled about the facts, in fact I have never been a Muslim," he told the Jewish leaders in Cleveland, according to a transcript of the private session

Put this in your chain e-mail and smoke it, Googlers.

And you know what? Being a Muslim shouldn't preclude anyone in the future running for President. And the idea that it would is plain old RACIST. Yes, you. You out there "worrying" that the guy with the funny name is a OOH SCARY MUSLIM! I got news for you. You're a racist. And an idiot: There were 20 guys on the 9/11 planes. THERE ARE MILLIONS AND MILLIONS OF FOLLOWERS OF ISLAM ALL OVER THE WORLD. Most of whom don't give a crap about America. Many of whom are just trying to take care of their families and get to their jobs and pay for their house. Just like you.

SO KNOCK THIS SHIT OFF, DAMMIT.

Asalaam Alaikum. (Peace be unto you.)

Ralph Nader announces he is running for president. Again.

What about the war, Ralph? Remember the war? What about foreign policy? What about tax cuts?

Give it up.

Via the blog of constitutional law professor Jonathan Turley:

Two Army Colonels at the Army War College are facing criminal charges in a perfectly bizarre effort to allegedly switch identities to avoid paternity payments. Col. Scott Carlson, 51, allegedly wanted to avoid paying additional paternity payments for a child with a Virginia woman. So, Bruce Adkins allegedly showed up at a paternity test center, claimed to be Carlson, and asked to take the test. They now face charges of tampering with public records, tampering with evidence, forgery, theft and obstruction of justice.

Carlson appears most at risk since Adkins attorney has said that he is cooperating. Carlson is on duty in Egypt. The charges will no doubt end their military career and could spend some jail time given the high visibility of the case. (Such cases often result in pleas counts to one or two with no or little jail time).

For the full story, click here.

So just because this cheap bastid didn't want to step up to his responsibilities, both their careers are now over. Nice. A lesson to you all out there: if you aren't going to take responsibility beforehand, you better darn well take it afterwards.

Thanks to Consumerist for pointing out this story, the in-depth investigation into that enormous national security threat... Lipitor ads!

Congress has been asking some tough questions while wearing their serious faces about why Dr. Robert Jarvik (inventor of the Jarvik artificial heart) is shilling Lipitor when he's not actually licensed to practice medicine.

ABC News says that Dr. Jarvik has been paid a guaranteed $1.35 million for the ads, which feature him espousing the virtues of Lipitor in a doctoriffic-looking lab coat and rowing around a lake talking about "when diet and exercise aren't enough."

Here's our favorite part of the story—the New York Times says that Dr. Jarvik uses a stunt double when he's shown rowing in the commercials.... For some reason we think this is hilarious.

Naturally, Congress is very concerned about fake rowing—they're sending out letters to Pfizer's ad agencies to inquire about it, as part of their overall investigation into the Lipitor commercials. We guess they're worried because fake rowing would play into an overall picture of deceptive advertising.

Where the hell was all this concern and hard-hitting journalism back in... oh, March 2003?

Would it be rude to write to my senators and say, "Are you kidding me? Tell them to put this stupid shit down and get back to work!"